What Keeps You From Writing?
For this week, I have a question that will draw in many different people with different answers.
“What keeps you from sitting down and writing?”
What is stopping that next killer blog post, mind-blowing novel, informative white paper or life-changing e-books from pouring out of your mind and onto paper?
External Noises
When we decide to be writers, all sorts of criticism and judgment from others may show up. And often, we don’t recognise our uncertainties and our fears for what they truly are. They hide behind to-do lists, cloaked in victimhood and responsibility to others, disguised in blame and shame through which we are incapable of seeing ourselves truthfully.
It took me some time to realise the things that others may say or have said to me about my writing. Here are just a few things that showed up:
- “It’s a waste of time.”
- “There are more important things to do.”
- “Your writing isn’t that good.”
- “It’s too hard to be a writer, are you sure you want to try?”
Internal Voices
After hearing those noises, we tend to turn internally, saying to ourselves in the privacy of our own minds at our desk with no words flowing: “I want to get up and walk away from writing.” And those doubts that were at the back of your mind starts getting louder:
- “Who cares about what I write? No one’s ever going to read this.”
- “Am I wasting my time? I might as well give up.”
Sometimes, of course, quitting is sensible. There’s no point carrying persistently on with something that you’ve lost all interest in.
BUT often, quitting isn’t the right choice. Perhaps a week later, a month later, or a year later, you find yourself wishing you’d just stuck with writing a little longer.
Overcome Challenging Situations
It could be that you’re going through a difficult period of your life, such as you have very young children, or maybe you have a chronic energy-depleting illness, or perhaps you work crazy hours at your day job.
It could be that you’ve received some really discouraging feedback, such as a nasty comment on one of your blog posts, or a mocking review of your first published novel, or an unusually harsh review of your work from a writing buddy.
Maybe your dearest and nearest don’t “get” your writing and is not being supportive. There are many writers blessed with a family full of wonderful sources of support. However, there are also many writers with partners, parents or friends who see their writing as a waste of time.
None of these is easy to overcome. Some people might casually tell you that “you’ll find time for it if it’s a priority” or “ignore trolls and haters.” But of course, it’s not that easy.
Some Ideas That Might Help
If your life isn’t currently very well-matched with writing:
- With your situation, what’s realistic right now? It might be that “realistic” is 20 minutes of writing after lunch, while the children are napping.
- What can you control? If you can’t do anything about the crazy shifts you work, maybe you could change your days-off routine around, so you can write first thing.
If you’ve had some discouraging feedback:
- Don’t force yourself to “get over it.” Give yourself a sensible time to be sad or angry about it. Maybe take a few days off from writing, get back up and move on.
- All writers get negative feedback. It’s impossible to have one piece of writing to be right for every single reader. Scroll through any popular book online and read the one-star reviews. There is this universal rule: There’s always lovers and haters.
If your nearest and dearest don’t “get” your writing:
- Don’t talk to them about your writing and continue to write. If they happen to interrupt, make them aware of it. If that doesn’t work, get out of the house and head to a library, café, or friend’s place where there is positivity. This leads me to the next point.
- Get to know fellow writers. A local group is a great option if your area has one or you can create one. An online group on forums or Facebook can also be really encouraging.
I Can Tell You This
I can’t talk you into sticking with it, nor can I sit with you while you write and encourage you to keep going.
But I can tell you this:
That poem you’re working on could be the one bright spot in someone’s crappy day. That novel you’re writing could become someone’s favourite for years and years to come. That blog post you’ve outlined could be exactly what someone needs to finally break through a barrier. And this won’t just happen once. This will happen repeatedly.
Don’t let your fears or uncertainties rob the world of what you have to give. Become capable to see yourself truthfully.
“So, what keeps you from sitting down and writing?”
Don’t be shy and have your say in the comment section 🙂
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Absolutely fantastic post and it includes all objections I need to overcome!
Thanks! Keep getting better at what you do 🙂
I write to reflect, to release stress. I write so I can let it go and move on. Writers block happens often but it always brings me back to the beginning.
I love your last point! Sometimes I get discouraged by my low page views and feel like I should just throw in the towel, that if I calculated the time spent working on my blog as an hourly wage, that I’d be making a negative profit. And often my loved ones (as much as I love them) are quick to point this out. But you’re absolutely right that even if my latest post brightens one person’s day, I will have made a difference!
Hi Kate, I totally understand that feeling. It’s the same in my case with some posts. Like you just mentioned, if it can brighten up one person’s day, I could live the whole day feeling content with that 🙂
I think my biggest challenge is often just fatigue, both mental and physical! I can only dedicate a small amount of time to writing after my day job and family’s needs are taken care of, and sometimes being able to push through and keep working (writing) is just too much. I often just have to muster everything I can and tell myself I want to do this, but not be too hard on myself either if I can’t hit my goals because it’s important we give ourselves a break, too!
Hi Frank, you’re such an awesome family man 🙂 Family comes first! I would do the same in your case. I have seen your work and it’s inspiring. Keep it up!
Yay for the writers life!!!
Absolutely! 🙂
This is a great, motivational and inspirational, post. It’s definitely those ‘inner voices’ that are my problem.
Thanks Phill! I think we all have that problem from time to time 🙂
beautiful post
Thank you 🙂
Hmmmm
🙂
Encouraging post Mr. Chen
Thank you Sara 🙂
At some points, I feel like I’m just not good enough in writing. Sure I could write but I am slow, it took me a while to come up with a post. And I start wondering, is writing my weakness? Should I focus on my weakness? Or focus on my strength and delegate my weakness?
This is probably the constant inner battle I have every day.
Hi Yuyu, I’m familiar with your content and I have to say, even though you’re a slower writer, you provide very useful content. You’re doing a great job.
Getting back to your question, I’m a big fan of doing what you’re good at, and delegate the tasks you’re less good at. However, the mean question is whether one can afford a writer in the company.
A different solution may be, I do this as well, is to allow guest blogger on your platform. Ask around and see if people are interested to become guest bloggers on your website. In return, you could offer more exposure and backlinks.
Another possible solution are services such as ‘Fiverr,’ where you can ask a freelance ghostwriter to write content for you. They have good rates to work with. I hope this helps 🙂
Thanks, Ye Chen. That means a lot coming from you. I do agree that delegating a task always comes down to a cost. I allow guest blogger on my blog but hasn’t put much effort to promote that. How does guest blogging work for you? I see you have a couple of posts up.
Interesting idea on the ghostwriter, never really thought of that before. Thanks 🙂
Very encouraging! Loved this! I definitely struggle with my motivation for writing sometimes but I’m pushing on cause it means that much to me!
That’s very good of you! Keep pursuing your dream and also be open-minded for new opportunities that are coming your way 🙂
You make some good points. I find meeting people through Facebook groups so helpful. My family and friends are not really interested in what I write about so getting encouragement or feedback from them does not happen. Thanks for some great tips.
You’re welcome Nicole, I know what you’e going though and I’m so happy for you to find support through Facebook. I’m lucky enough to have a few friends who support me 🙂
Since I was a kid, I have heard countless times that I got this talent of putting thoughts into words. Little did I know that having very little kids around and a demanding full-time job can take a toll on that. I love my children and I will never trade them for the world, but what I am trying to say is… Writing has always been one of my strongest suits and it is a shame that I am stuck right now with nothing but titles…
Hi Donna, thanks for sharing 🙂 Whenever the time comes for you to be able to put more stories on paper, you’ll have so much to write about. I’ll be looking forward to that 🙂
For many, writing represent a mental asylum. They seek shelter in the words, in their meaning, in what they signify. It’s never just a venting, it’s often stimulation, empowerment, a self-representation. And it’s important to keep encouraging people to speak their mind, even if it just for them.
Very good post.
According to me, its the fear of failure is something that keeps one away from the things we actually want to do- writing. However, if we are determined to pour out our thought from minds to blank papers who knows someone may find it magical and useful.
Also, I think you meant “poem” here instead of “poet” in this line: ‘That poet you’re working on could be the one bright spot in someone’s crappy day.’
Hi there, exactly! I feel that we are too scared of confrontation or being judged, that we stop trying and choose to live inside our bubble. I hope to spark some boldness with this post.
Thank you so much for pointing that out. I fixed it 🙂
You are welcome