Honestly, What Does Success Mean To You?
It is an age-old question, but it’s important enough to be reminded of because “we all want success.”
We chase money, fame, education, relationships and countless other things, which is okay. We want to be successful and feel successful. However, we rarely stop to ask ourselves: “What is success to us?” Or more importantly, “What is success to you?”
Continue to ask yourself this question. Your answer may change over time.
Few people pause to reflect what it truly means to achieve success in their own lives. If we don’t answer this question, chances are we end up climbing the wrong ladder and pursue someone else’s version of success. We achieve our goals only to realise they were the wrong ones. It’s an adversity few people are able to recover from.
We can’t define or measure failure on the side of success, yet failure is proof that success is possible. One way to measure success is how well we have gone through the process of elimination – what success is not.
What Success Is Not To Us
Before we can pursue success, we need to understand what success isn’t – who we are not. Try to spend a few minutes on social media. You will notice how many people hold a very narrow definition of success thinking it’s about building wealth, owning a billion-dollar company or gathering a large social media following.
None of these is wrong but being like these people don’t necessarily make you successful. Many people have fought their way to the top only to feel miserable and burned out once they get there. They’re unhappy because they pursued what success is not – one that didn’t match their values.
Various Ideas Of Success
During childhood and early adulthood, we learn and adopt various ideas of success from our parents, teachers and friends. Everyone has their own plan and idea of who and what we should be. Although it’s okay to value the opinions and hopes of others, we shouldn’t necessarily adopt them as our own. No one can enforce their version of success on us, and no one can tell us what it means to live a good life.
It’s easy to assume that success means obtaining something, such as a job or social status, and to believe that if we get that something, we’ll be successful. Winston Churchill said, “Success is not final, failure is not fatal. It is the courage to continue that counts.”
If we rest our definition of success on one or two achievements, it’s almost guaranteed that we’ll be disappointed.
What Success Is To Us
We must set our goals, objectives and paths based on what we desire, not what someone else wants for us. Is it more money? That’s fine. I got nothing against money. Maybe it’s a healthy family. Maybe it’s a happy marriage?
Some people may find that helping people brings them the most joy, and therefore success looks like a life given to others. Some want to leave this world a better place than they found it. Some realise that building a business or product brings them happiness. Some prefer isolation and others prefer constant activity.
The simple yet overlooked truth is that “what makes me happy doesn’t make someone else happy,” and vice versa. My vision of success probably looks nothing like yours, and that’s how it should be. If we fail to define success for ourselves and try to pursue someone else’s path, we’ll end up unfulfilled, unhappy and back to feeling deeply unsuccessful.
It’s also important to appreciate that in many ways, we already are successful. If we assume that we are failures until we reach a specific goal, we set ourselves up for unhappiness. We have to recognise all we have already accomplished.
Ask yourself:
- Where have I already been successful in my life?
- How can I continue to carry on that success?
- What are my lessons learned from those successes?
- How can I develop further in those areas?
Be Specific With Your Goal And Journey
When we reach a certain milestone, that is a part of success, but we don’t stop there. Success is both a goal and a journey. We push higher and harder, striving for more and to be better. But many struggles with finding their paths.
Here are a few questions to help you on your way:
- What really matters to me?
- What lights my fire with the right type of passion?
- How do I want to live my life?
- Who do I want to be?
- What do I want my legacy to be?
The more specific your answers are to these questions, the more focus you have in achieving that part of success. Saying: “What really matters to me is happiness” will not be enough. If you can’t see clearly, you won’t really know what that means, or what you’re doing or where you’re going. The same is true of your vision of success.
But before you start moving forward, evaluate where you’re at now.
This is a time for honest evaluation, no sugar coating whatsoever. Where you are not is not as important as where you are now. And it’s just as important where you are not as it is where you are.
After that, set some specific goals. These goals should be achievable and realistic but still challenging. Think about how you can measure your goals. If you can’t measure it, how do you know you’re making progress towards your goal?
Say you want to read more to be successful; set a goal of 30 books this year, not just “read more.” Say you want to improve your writing skills to be successful; set a goal of writing 100 articles this year, not just “write more.”
If you don’t define success, someone else will do it for you, and it’s going to be on their terms.
Start on the right path today.
- What does success mean to you?
- Where have you already been successful in life?
- Who do you want to be?
Have your say in the comment section 🙂
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Success can be a fickle thing to measure. We can spend a lifetime chasing success as defined by the world, and after all our days have been numbered, find out we never measured up to success as set out by the worlds measuring stick.
Success should be how each individual defines it. If we’re happy, content and truly feel fulfilled, then maybe that defines success. Money certainly doesn’t define it. There are plenty of filthy rich people in the world, whose lives and family and such are living disasters. Not success in my book.
Love your writing. It is very deep and thought-provoking. Because of that, I’ve nominated you for a Sunshine Blogger Award.
Hi Glen, you’re absolutely right! Success should be how each individual defines it. I’ve come across many people who measures their success by the world’s standard, which only left them unfulfilled and unhappy.
Wow Glen thank you so much! I really appreciate this 🙂
Success towards mean a life of freedom to pursue lots of different projects, travel, try things and fail, and be as compassionate as I can towards other people, animals and the planet 🙂
That’s such a humble meaning if success 🙂
I have come to realise that success for me is enjoying my family and the little things in life.
That’s great Nicki 🙂
Insightful post. Goals are definitely individual and need to be adjusted over time.
My original goal was to complete a marathon, however I have achieved this goal and now want to run another one but in a quicker time.
I have written a post on setting SMART goals on my blog as people struggle to set realistic but challenging goals.
Thanks for the post!
Hi Natalie, so great of you for completing a marathon 🙂 I will check you post on setting SMART goals today.
You are right, the definition of success does change. Different things become important. Right now my idea of success is to go slow to go fast. Slowing down means I feel better about my self and my life. Thank you for your very thought provoking article.
Hi Katherine, that’s a nice idea of success 🙂 you’re very welcome!
I think, just as you’ve implied, success is a moving target that changes as we grow, achieve goals and learn new things. I also think you’re right when you say that we need to be sure we consistently check in with ourselves to know when a path is not right for us. For years, I had felt as if I was blowing in the breeze, because I was doing what others thought I should be doing. Now that I realize how precious time is—my mom passed suddenly 2 years ago—I have made a commitment to myself not to waste it going down a path that doesn’t feel right. Thanks for sharing some important ideas on this ultra important topic.
Hi Vox, thank you for sharing. I’m sorry to hear your mom passed away two years ago, but I’m so happy to hear you’re committed on going down a path thats feels right to you. You’re very welcome and find your own success – that makes you happy 🙂
Success means happiness..great post
Thank you 🙂
Success is being contented with where you are and what you have! Love this!
That’s great LaRena! And thank you 🙂
Success for me is quite simple. It’s just obedience to Christ
Hi Jen, great you found your meaning of success 🙂
You definitely have me thinking! The meaning of success has changed throughout my lifetime. I care less about social status and more about personal success achieved through writing. Family has always meant everything all the way through.
Hi Susie, that’s a great transition and an amazing life value 🙂
Good post with a good message!
Thanks Kyle 🙂
I think about this a lot. Sometimes, I feel that I’m not as successful as I’d imagined to be at this age. But then, when I re-evaluate and shift my perspective, I know that I do have success – in terms of a long-term relationship, a roof over my head, good health, great friends and family, a good education. And this year, I’ve taken action to work towards my goals.
Success isn’t always measured in salaries and high paying careers, after all. 🙂
Hi Anita, I’m glad you’re aware of that. Count your milestones successes as well 🙂
For my children to be happy and healthy.
That’s wonderful Phillip 🙂
Great post.
Thank you 🙂
Very true ❤️
Amazing post, I agree with you, it’s our life and if we are happy and reached where we want to see us then we are successful. Thank you
Thank you 🙂 It’s a question we should ask ourselves more often.